Thursday, May 13, 2010

Frustrated


The mind-body connection is amazing. Sometimes it isn't so fun though. It boggles my mind.
Yesterday I was sort of anticipating something, but not really consciously. My body however, took that anticipation and used it. I was like a zombie at work. I had trouble shaking the lost/blank feeling.
This has happened a few other times and it is usually about something serious in my life. Over the last few months our family has been drug down by church "crap." Sorry, that is the only word that seems to cover the ridiculous, sad and spiritual abuse. Anywho...

For the first week or so, every time it was discussed or alluded to I started to become nauseous and had headaches. My body was just as upset and hurt by the happenings as my mind.
My older brother had a heart-attack at 26. I was away at some training while they were trying to get a grip on the why's. He had several angio-things. The days that he did, I was either like a zombie or felt ill. I wasn't worrying that I could tell, but my body reacted.

The anticipation from yesterday was a let down and I then was just so exhausted, could have slept a lot longer this morning. Crazy.


Alissa
P.S. I don't know anything about Voddie Baucham. Some "leadership" has kicked my family and others under the bus for apparent following of Mr. Baucham. Hmmmm.

I share that simply because I think a few of those who were fed that lie about me and my family read this blog. I hate feeling like I need to protect myself from fellow Christians, but I do.

4 comments:

  1. Eesh, I know the feeling. I hate feeling like I have a knot in my stomach for some subconscious reason. Love you!

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  2. Thinking of you...I'm sorry you're dealing with "crap". No wise words just a hug from afar. (I don't know much about Voddie B. either. His book is on my wish list because of things others have said but that means nothing other than I'd like to read it and see what he says.)

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  3. I'm sorry your anticipation was disappointed, yesterday. I used to be the Queen of Disappointment! Not a title I treasured.:-P Anyway, I know what you mean about physical reactions to mental or emotional stress. I've had a weird change in the "symptoms" of my sympathetic, fight-or-flight responses. Now, instead of just having a racing heart, for example, I instantly get a weird tingly feeling in my face. I never noticed that before. Yep, we are definitely fearfully and wonderfully made!

    Okay, that was rather long. Sorry!

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