Friday, May 07, 2010

Learning.

Learning...everyday I am learning.
When I was in Missouri, I was on a perpetual rollercoaster with my emotions.
It showed to those around me.
I don't want to do that again. I feel like I'm beginning to:S
While I was there I was so uncertain of what was next. I was unsure about going into the Fast Track, I was unsure of doing something on my own, I was unsure of so much.
This week I've seen it creeping back up on me.
There have been small things that I let myself think were indications of change coming.
I don't want to work at Runza for years upon years.
I want to move on to the next part of my life, and I want that to be with a husband and family of my own.
I don't wait very good. I'm allowing so much to stop me from focusing on the Master.
My little over-active imagination, over-analyzing and impatience brain is a problem.
I hate sharing my "problems" with anyone because it seem so small and trivial when I say it out loud. I end up just feeling alone. There I am...back to square one...my biggest fear...
...is being alone.
I don't even know who reads this and I don't really need to know.
Writing it down somewhere helps a bit.
But what I really need? To turn to the Lord, to cast all my cares upon him and to trust.
"You, LORD, give true peace to those who depend on you, because they trust you." --Isaiah 26:3
"Let the peace that Christ gives control your thinking, because you were all together in one body to have peace. Always be thankful." --Colossians 3:15
"So don't worry because I am with you. Don't be afraid because I am God. I will make you strong and I will help you; I will support you with my right hand that saves you." --Isaiah 41:10
Alissa

2 comments:

  1. Oh, Alissa, I hear you. And I'm praying for you a lot. And I love you very much!

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  2. I think you display God's work in you and it's awesome to see!

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